View From The Window

I was told a few weeks ago that negotiations on the sale of Washington House were underway, it would seem then they have come to naught as nothing more has been heard, I am told the price has been dropped considerably but I am not sure the sellers have a good idea of considerably.

I have had a large, glass corner cabinet in the shop now for at least a year, maybe two, and it has not moved, I have even tried to give it away to no avail, so with the new carpet tiles due I decided to once and for all get rid of it, so I phoned up 'Furniture Matters' a charity, to come and collect. Charlie and Fred arrived on the day and I watched as they entered the shop, stopped, and looked up and down at the cabinet rubbing their chins.

C&F: We can't take that mate.
Me: Why?
C&F: There's glass in it.
Me: Yes, it's a glass cabinet!
C&F: Is it safety glass?
Me: I don't know, I bought it when the world was not insane and you used safety glass on aeroplanes.
C&F: Our hands are tied, Health and Safety mate, innit.

I had of course known I was wasting my time, but there you go, confirmed. I then phoned a 'Man with a Van', can you get rid of a cabinet for me? No, can't do that, I would have to get a permit and then they would charge me at the tip, too much bother, that's why there is an upsurge in fly tipping you see, no, you don't say. As a last resort I phoned the St. Johns, no they didn't want it either, no call for dark wood these days, we'd just be left with it, better you are left with it, ta ra love. In a rage I broke it down and carefully packed the bits in the new car and took it to the tip, where I had to visit three different skips under the scrutiny of the Guardians of the Refuse in their luminous uniforms, in order to eventually rid myself of it.

Have you noticed now that the first thing a delivery guy and his mate do is find a reason not to deliver your goods, my new cooker from Curry's was a no no as my kitchen is, wait for it, up a set of stairs, could I vouch the stairs would hold the weight of the cooker, no, but the other one and the rest of the furniture managed to get up there no problem. We actually had to cancel the order as they would not attempt the stairs, the new outfit took theirs up no problem. The Openreach woman didn't want to put my fibre broadband in as she had to climb a ladder. The miserable so and so who came to put my new PO equipment in last week immediately said, no way, I can't get into that, it must have been put in and the counter built around it. No, the counter has been here at least 30 years, the PO equipment was put in eighteen years ago, mind you he said it as if I was someone who cared, it wouldn't be me for the highjump because the new equipment was not installed. Guess what, he did manage it once he actually tried.

My niece received a house recently and was waiting for an inspector to visit so that it could be made habitable for her, small problems if any could be fixed. She was seriously asked to sit outside the house for four weeks from 0800 to 1600 each day, excepting Saturday and Sunday of course, because the Council would not give her a time and date for an appointment. That is until my sister got in on the act, job sorted.

I was also maddened by having to deal with a banking problem this week, I phoned one bank to be told it was the other bank's problem, then I got the same from the second bank, I went too and fro at least three times. I also got to talk to people half way across the world who did not understand what I was on about. But what really took the biscuit was trying to tell the robot answering machine what my query related to in a Scottish accent which it quite obviously could not handle, it did pick up some words which were not meant for it and are universal, not Scottish. I managed to hold on to my sanity only because a kind lady pointed me in the right direction despite telling me she could not infringe the data protection act or financial regulations act to help me.


How have we turned into a nation of can't do rather than one of can do, how did we ever defeat Hitler or run an Empire, how did we turn the corner and run scared from a bunch of European nobodies whom we saved on two occasions.

I have just been notified that part of my duties as a Subpostmaster is to be on the lookout for modern slavery and if I spy any I am to report it right away, this is in keeping with the Modern Slavery Guidance for Subpostmasters booklet I am to receive in the next few weeks. I didn't know when I signed up to this I was being recruited to watch for money launderers, financial irregularities and now white slavers. I am an upstanding member of the community and naval veteran but I am not Elliot Ness.

I started watching the BBC's Detectorists when it first came out and quite enjoyed the first season, it was easy watching and quite pleasant. The second season was not as good, it had its moments but something was going awry. I have now sat and watched the third episode of the new series and our two hero's have now morphed into a couple of gutless wonders afraid of their own shadows, I have never seen such pathetic looking men in my life, no, I tell a lie, the guy in Motherland beats even these two useless articles. But back to the originals, one looks like he is ready to burst into tears at a moments notice while the other does an excellent job as a doormat for everyone to walk over. One has a wife and the other a girlfriend, how did they manage that, what on earth would a woman see in these two?