Spring has certainly sprung and global warming has turned up at last in my immediate vicinity after several decades of gloom and doom prophecies, or perhaps it is just an early summer. I have missed a lot of madness but it never disappoints and just keeps coming, like much of the population of the EU, they have even reached Skye and John O'Groats which did surprise me, although the majority of the workforce does seem to be locals, there can't be a lot of spare jobs in Skye. What did shock me was the number of leather clad young men of middle eastern origin roving the streets of Inverness and generally being a nuisance, they must really be running from something to end up in Inverness.
Manchester will be happy that Andy Burnham won the mayoral election rather than Mr. Mohammed Aslam who made his keynote speech and distributed leaflets for the position in Urdu. I watched an interview with Mr. Aslam who obviously had difficulty with the English language, who saw nothing wrong with his campaign and in a strange way he may be right as English is not the language of choice in the part of Manchester he is from.
Why do criminals increasingly get to avoid facing their victims or the families of their victims in courts now by 'appearing' on a video link. Not for them the inconvenience of turning up to face their accusers and receive their punishment face to face, make up, lights, camera, action, then back for another bowl of gruel.
Victoria Beckham OBE for services to ...... fashion. Much like services to sport, entertainment, working abroad, paper folding etc. How many real women can afford to wear anything made by Victoria Beckham, what exactly does the Empire get from a woman who seems to go out of her way to present herself as miserable as sin to the world.
And what about Prince Phillip retiring, how the media crowed about the fact he can now take it easy, go on big man, no more exhausting days cutting ribbons, hand shaking and waving for you. Getting up at five, going down the pit, cycling off to the steel works, no wait, wrong Phillip. No wonder the Royals last so long, they do nothing to wear out, they do not even squeeze their own toothpaste!
Schadenfreude, what a great word, pleasure from the misfortune of others, trust the Germans to come up with that one, but we all enjoy a bit of 'up yours matey' when justice comes calling. Noel Edmonds the man who began the dumbing down of British television and brought us Mr. Blobby (Morecambe was going to have a Blobby World, long story, didn't end well for Morecambe) and the 'game' show where people opened boxes his hit the end of the track again. Mr. Edmonds wants £73 million from HBOS as he was asset stripped by a bunch of fraudsters working for the bank, now those particular fraudsters job was to help failing, yes, failing businesses, so how his failing business was looted of £73 million may be a bit hard to explain in court. Noel is a believer in the lunatic idea that if you want something you simply ask the Cosmos for help and voila, the Cosmos has given up on you Noel, he doesn't like you, No Deal mate. And I am sick of asking for that Lamborghini.
That's all I have time for this week, but the list is full.