Sunday, 24 July 2016

View From The WIndow

Here we are again, gazing out the window fortified by two slices of toast with syrup and a cup of Rosy, the kind of breakfast which built the Empire. It is still muggy and needs another thunderstorm to clear the air, it threatens rain and a little fell during the night but as to the rest of the day your guess is as good as mine. We have new neighbours up the road at the 'Blue House', the young couple who lived there needed a larger house so I noticed yesterday a slightly older couple moving in.

I also caught a hilarious escapade from the window yesterday, the missus was in the PO and I was doing some drawing, the window was slightly ajar as it was hot, a car pulled up and parked on the pavement, this is usual for Warton so traffic can pass one another. About ten minutes later I heard a kind of screeching scream 'Dan!' faint but it made me pause, I looked out the window and the car was still there but I couldn't see anyone, back to the maps, cries of 'Dan!' got louder, I looked again, I saw the car door move, bang, bang, 'Dan!' I put my stylus down and headed downstairs to the PO, inside was a large guy with a West Coast Scottish accent telling his life story to the missus, is your name Dan mate, I enquired, no it was John, but as he was the only person around I said I think someone in the car is trying to get your attention. A few minutes later it would seem he was right as I had wrongly identified John as Dan, as once again it was screamed from the car and the door banging increased. After another ten minutes with the voice diminishing due to being hoarse John turned up and drove away. The wife had already spotted the frantic waving, banging of the door and heard the screams but John shrugged it off with 'she is a bit of a nag.'

The door to the PO banged open one day, it must surprise some people, like a fly hitting itself against a window too stupid to know it is there, because they nearly take it off its hinges as they burst through, and when you are dozing off behind the computer screens it comes as a bit of a shock, especially around 3 ish. Anyway she sprints to the counter and throws a cheque at me, to be banked I quickly deduced as I am not told what for, you need an envelope says I, no I don't came the confident but obviously annoyed reply. Yes, you cannot bank here without putting cheques in an envelope, well they do it at Bolton-le-Sands I'm swiftly assured, no they don't I hit back, no PO in the land is allowed to bank a cheque without an envelope. Not convinced she grabs the cheque back and heads for the door, no doubt heaping curses on me for incompetence and punching Bolton-le-Sands into her satnav. As she disappears out the door I slowly raise my right leg and surreptitiously push closed the drawer containing envelopes for banking......

 The BBC just doesn't care anymore now that they have got their licence fee safe for, what is it, ten years or so. You don't even have to look for the bias anymore, subtlety is not in their vocabulary, have you seen one of the hilarious 'Brexit One Month On' pieces where they go to an area which voted leave and find a successful business man, or woman, who are obviously not on the bones of their behinds for a fearful quote that, eh, nothing has changed, damn! Then, yes you know what's coming, the local dosser who hasn't had a job in his life but has latched on to the fact that he can blame foreigners for the fact he hasn't worked since leaving school.

Are you enjoying the Labour Party's convulsions and wondering what is coming next, well, anyone with a brain knows Jeremy is coming next, a bold statement but one predicated on the fact the Party, not the MP's love him. Democracy in action again. Anyway the point I am getting to is that I listened to Owen Smith, no I don't know who he is either, bleating on about wanting a more just Britain, a Britain that works for the poor and not just the rich, a Britain with a well funded NHS, a Britain which plays its part in the World, a Britai.................screeech. You get the idea, but then a thought suddenly hit me, didn't his party have thirteen years to provide all that and by his own utterances did none of it? Chuka Ammuna are you reading this (see last weeks View?) They all seem to know what needs to be done when in opposition but do nothing about it when actually in power.

This is Owen Smith.

The Russians have been doping their athletes, were you as surprised as me about that one, no, unless you work in the media, you probably shrugged your shoulders and thought they have been at it since Uncle Joe, so what's new. I am a layman but it seems to me that doping, along with corruption, goes hand in hand with modern sport and the huge amounts of money involved may be at the heart of it. Just as well all those non-Russian athletes and sports people who get caught are either innocent or have been framed, or are going to clear their names, bloody Russians.

I came late to this one and still find it incredible, the Pokemon Go thing where you go around 'hunting' these ridiculous looking characters on your phone, young hip people are so engrossed with this they are walking in front of cars or off the sides of buildings or whatever to claim the points, one teenager has already been shot dead while trespassing to get one. Did Darwin get it wrong, it would seem to me we don't evolve but go backwards.

And  Celebrity World went ballistic recently because Victoria Beckham kissed her daughter on the lips, if you are the kind of person who thinks a mother kissing her daughter is weird, you are the one who needs to check in to a facility near you, see, I am not wrong with the evolution thing.


  1. Owen Smith is a Socialist (he said so), but is easily confused with another type of politician, an Opportunist. Jeremy Corbyn is also a Socialist (he said so too), but may also be confused with a Subversive. Both can openly criticise what has gone on before within the Labour Party because, it turns out, the last Labour government wasn't Labour at all, but Blairite, which is bad, but for a number of years was considered good. I think it's a bit like butter, which was good for you, then bad, but now good again (unless you're lactose intollerant or something).

    1. So butter is good again, but it now has to be from grass fed, happy cows in Anderson castle.